• By Gracilis,  Racism & Rape,  violnce

    Violence Against Women

    Tomorrow we  will be celebrating the International Day for Elimination of Violence against Women and violence in itself has got many forms. Violence can sometimes be physical  but there can be verbal violence .There can also be sexual violence  which can be first manifest as emotional violence. And when we celebrate   a day for the Elimination of Violence against Women. It brings us to a place  where we consider one of the greatest forms of violence against women- the subject of sexual violence and considering rape .Current statistics show that about 2.5% of women and 0.4% of male have been victims of a sexual offence with about 90% of the…

  • By Gracilis,  Friendship,  Relationship skills

    About Frenemies 2

    After last week’s article on Frenemies, I got feedback from people that showed that it was something that resonated with them . As I thought about the sequalae, and what next to write, I suddenly remembered what a friend once told me about her dad. We were talking about something and the name of a government official came up. This man was among the first five men ruling the country at that time. She shocked me when she said   “that man was my dad’s friend. He used to visit our house”. I was really surprised that they knew such an influential person in the corridors of power and before I…

  • By Gracilis,  Friendship,  Relationship skills,  Uncategorized

    About Frenemies

    When I was eight  years old,  a friend whom I met in the after school lessons gave me a card. It was titled “Why God made friends” and although I don’t remember all the words of the card. I remember this  part “God made friends because he knew mothers could not be everywhere“.  And although it has been  over three decades, I look back and see that most of my philosophy of friendship has always had a mother’s perspective. I also learnt how to be a friend by observing how my mum related with her friends, both  in their presence and absence. If my mother is your friend, you know your back is covered…

  • By Gracilis,  Romance,  Single Life

    Weird Proposals

    I  sit back at my desk thinking of what to write today as I have just returned from a long day shift. I hardly ever run out of ideas and have been thinking about topics we would be dealing with very soon but if there is any thing I would generally like to write about , it is those things I remember that bring laughter. Laughter sometimes not because it is funny but because somethings are so crazily akward that the only appropriate response is to laugh. I remember as a child going towards the bus stop  where the shoemakers usually keep their wares / There was this particular shoemaker …

  • Attitude,  By Gracilis,  Single Life

    Pregnant? An altar reason

    Not all marriages begin with “Will you marry me ?”. Some of them begin with “I don carry belle” (“I don carry belle” means I have an unplanned pregnancy)-Facebook Post by Godwin Tom-Lawyer (things that make you say chai )   Sometime ago, my elder brother (Godwin) put up the above post on Facebook (seriously almost all his posts are interesting and when I read it, it initially brought laughter. However, after the laughter, I thought about all the people that I have seen in the latter predicament who sadly had taken that path to save face immediately but actually had found themselves in terrible conditions later on in the long run. While we…

  • By Gracilis,  Marriage,  Single Life

    Perfect Picture

    One of the signs of a good book is the ability to enjoy it over and over again .  Some  of our articles have been voted as most read and most loved and some readers have suggested we put those  articles in a category  “Timeless stories” and periodically publish them again. The article below is one of them which I believe is great for us to reread especially as  we have five more months to go this year ..Enjoy I recently started a new job and am still in the process of knowing everybody. It is almost two weeks now but I still seem to be meeting new people daily.…

  • By Gracilis,  Single Life

    That “other” woman 5

     This is the concluding part from part 4…… Basically, her husband was a service provider whom I made contact with severally to supply certain things and my crime was that on her accompanying him to the delivery this particular time, she found out that my address had changed and he knew the new place I resided. I recall coming out to pick the goods  and noticing her face was a bit sour that day but  I concluded  then  that  there was probably  something else on her mind . I tell you it was painful but I did not know the extent of the pain until I left her presence and got on the one hour bus…

  • Borrowing,  By Gracilis,  Finances

    Cutting your coat

    One of the great things about people is that they come in all sizes and shapes. Most of us have friends, relatives and people who always like to appear to be more than they are and quite frankly, they are doing a good job at it. They have perfected the art so well leaving no room for doubts but no matter how hard they try, we are always awakened to the reality when they come again knocking at our doors, to borrow something else or more. Sometimes reality also means we are the ones knocking on doors to borrow, yet again. I still remember the first thing I borrowed. The…

  • Borrowing,  By Gracilis,  Finances

    Cutting your coat

    One of the great things about people is that they come in all sizes and shapes. Most of us have friends, relatives and people who always like to appear to be more than they are and quite frankly, they are doing a good job at it. They have perfected the art so well leaving no room for doubts but no matter how hard they try, we are always awakened to the reality when they come again knocking at our doors, to borrow something else or more. Sometimes reality also means we are the ones knocking on doors to borrow, yet again. I still remember the first thing I borrowed. The…

  • By Gracilis,  Love

    Closer than you think

    The day has come and it could bring surprises, both pleasant and unpleasant . Some relationships will end today while  some will truly begin today . While I do not want to sound like a prophet of doom, the reality of the words you have just read is apt. Bit on the flip side, sometimes we are expecting love to be  mystical, all of a sudden  and filled with some kind of spooky .Having read so many romance novels and had our fair share of   romantic films, we want to cross seven rivers and climb seven mountains to find true love .The truth however is that  more often than not,…

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