• By Gracilis,  Love,  Marriage,  Single Life

    Marriage is ……

    Happy new year once again! I am so excited to be back at my desk and writing. I have thought of several things to say but maybe I should start with this one as it relates to what I want to talk about. Towards the end of last year, I got married! Thank you for your congratulations. That is a life changing event I owe you as my readers to know. Perhaps it would show in the style of writing, going forwards. You know it was really an exciting time before the wedding. As the countdown to the wedding started, I had to answer several phone calls and agree to…

  • Just got married,  Marriage,  Single Life

    Newlywed vibes 1

    One of the comments I heard while I was single from some well-intentioned guys is “I am your husband” . It was enough for me to walk away laughing.  However, this little statement has had a different effect on me since I said ‘I DO’. Marriage is good – it really is, and I’ll defend and support getting married to the right person any day and anytime. However, God in His infinite wisdom has decided that we would not come to each other as perfect beings, but work together to achieve perfection in Him. The process is not a joke. Three weeks after I got married my husband demanded that…

  • Attitude,  Marriage,  Single Life

    Desperate Marriage

    I met my husband at my church convention, one of the biggest ministries in Africa. We served in the same unit and got talking. We became friends and later o,n he proposed. I was 36 years and I was already anxious because all my five sisters got married in their mid-twenties, the one considered to have gotten married late was 29 and it was because she was studying for her masters. My husband was into dry cleaning business and after a while, the business packed up. I wasn’t deterred, I was confident things would work, I had my plans laid out. I was running a side business because where I…

  • Attitude,  By Gracilis,  Love,  Marriage

    Wicked Lovers

    I did not mean to eavesdrop but the conversation was being said in such a way that I could not help but listen. Two of my bosses were discussing their current predicament. One was advising the other on what to do since he had had the experience before. They had both been struck by the “D” word. “Make sure you move the money to your independent account . My ex transferred all the money to her account on the night she told me she wanted a divorce!” I was wondering why that was the most important thing for a wife  to do on the night  of a divorce  announcement but…

  • Betrayal,  Love,  Marriage,  Men Talk

    Foolish Lovers

    I come from a broken home with both parents remarried. I was the only child between them. I was very lonely growing up because my siblings from both my parents were my half brothers and sisters and I was always seen and treated as the outsider so I never really belonged anywhere. I had vowed even before I met Christ that no child of mine would experience the kind of life I had. Being a Christian helped to reinforce my decision. I would marry a God-fearing woman who loved God and will honor our marriage. A nagging voice at the back of my mind kept  whispering  to me that divorce…

  • Father;s Day,  Marriage,  Relationship skills

    Mum didn’t know 4

    Growing up for me was blissful. I had a father who would listen,  empower  and reinforce to me the fact that God fearfully and wonderfully created me. Daddy told me daily how I could be anything I wanted to be. You see, my daddy was 30 years older than my mother. He was better educated in “terms of certificates” than her and he was a greatly travelled gentleman. My mother on the flip side, was only a standard six certificate  holder, from  a more humble background but “a very intelligent woman” without the glory of “many paper certificates”. By virtue of the gap in their background, my mother’s mantra was…

  • Marriage,  Romance,  Wedding

    After the Wedding 2

    I love my husband. Love was not at first sight but it came and it is here to stay.  However the process of oneness is not as simple as ‘…I now pronounce you man and wife…’  I’d like to share one of the first issues I faced in my marriage.I expected a few storms and I tried to imagine various scenarios that could arise but nothing prepared me for this particular issue.   Being the only daughter in a large household, I had always enjoyed the privilege of having my own room, with my own furniture. As a student, I bought a house and enjoyed a very large bedroom with…

  • Marriage,  Single Life,  Wedding

    After the Wedding

    I do not know if you have had the experience of hearing these four words “I am your husband!”  I smile thinking about the few guys who introduced themselves to me in this way during my single days. It was enough for me to walk away laughing.  However, this little statement has had a different effect on me since I said ‘I DO’.Marriage is good – it really is, and I’ll defend and support getting married to the right person any day and anytime. However, God in His infinite wisdom has decided that we would not come to each other as perfect beings, but work together to achieve perfection in…

  • By Gracilis,  Love,  Marriage,  Romance

    After Valentine’s Day

    So this week was Valentine and it was right in the middle of a working week. This was a valid excuse for not going out for me. Coupled with the fact that I enjoy relaxing after work at home. Well, one of the things I did was to scan social media as  knew there will be some pranks for the day and I was not disappointed. In short, the very first one was a tweet from one guy asking that people should kindly tweet till it got to the present consent. Meanwhile, his tweet was to one certain named fellow. not to buy the lie, his girlfriend named also would…

  • Marriage,  Romance,  sex

    Romantic Sex

    I cannot believe it is the first Friday in November.  It just feels like it was yesterday we were wishing each other “Happy New Year” and then the month of February came. I am not sure how that month went for you and your significant other but for me, I remember it with dismay. Yes, it was the lover’s month but I must confess I did not get a card this last Valentine which ironically is also my birth month. Come to think of it, I am not sure I even received one last year or even the year before that. I am not sure if it is something that…

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