• By Gracilis,  Pregnancy,  sex,  Single Life

    Pregnancy -induced marriages

     Not all marriages begin with “Will you marry me ?”. Some of them begin with “I don carry belle” (“I don carry belle” means I have an unplanned pregnancy)-Facebook Post by Godwin Tom-Lawyer (things that make you say chai )   Sometime ago, my elder brother (Godwin) put up the above post on Facebook (seriously almost all his posts are interesting and when I read it, it initially brought laughter. However, after the laughter, I thought about all the people that I have seen in the latter predicament who sadly had taken that path to save face immediately but actually had found themselves in terrible conditions later on in the long run. While we…

  • Family,  Pregnancy,  Wedding

    My hidden Pregnancy

      I was not overly worried about not having a baby immediately after I got married because I had had a revelation where I was pregnant with twins. Two years after marriage I was 40. I asked God for a 40th birthday present- my own baby. I missed my period and excitedly went for a test and it was positive, was quite happy. Some days later (Aunty Flow-the monthly visitor) showed up. I got confused   and then I went for another test and it came out negative. I decided to do a scan. The scan results showed I had ovarian cyst in one of my ovaries. I did the scan…

  • Family,  Grief,  Pregnancy

    Two lines, then one line

    Talking about loss can be quite heavy on the tongue.  I don’t think anyone finds it particularly easy; whether it’s a Doctor delivering bad news, or a policewoman sent to tell the family, or a phone call from abroad, there is no convenient time to hear about a loved one dying.  Here’s a story telling of a unique kind of loss, one we try not to focus on a lot – mainly because it is a private matter – even though it hurts like any other. Two lines. That’s how we met.  I was sort of expecting to meet you, but you came a little earlier than planned.  I remember…

  • By Gracilis,  Mother's Day,  Pregnancy

    Are you pregnant?

    Sade had been married for eight years and was not looking forward to her husband’s birthday. She wished there would not be another family gathering or party. Unfortunately her husband did not understand .She confessed to my friend who was in her thirties and  still single  then that she envied her and wished they could exchange places .She told her “It is better to be single than to live like this, every time I walk into the room, I can feel all the eyes on my abdomen, expecting to see something”. I feel her.I know what it is to go somewhere and have everyone’s eyes on your fingers like ………

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