Attitude,  Marriage,  Single Life

Much Ado about Nothing

Not everybody wants to stay single.
Not everybody wants to get married.
Not everybody wants to remain married.

However due to circumstances of life, personal, family, societal, religious  and other reasons:

Persons may not be able to get married, despite their personal preferences.

Persons who would rather be single, get into marriage.

Persons remain in loveless and/or abusive marriages (perhaps to maintain a facade) despite their best interests.

I got married at 39 years, 5 months and 4 days.

Prior to that time, I had a friend who would plague my every Facebook post with marriage references, if I posted that the sun was shining, he would comment that it would have shone better/brighter if I was married.
No post was immune to his invasion.

I consequently formulated Tom’s Law, which states that as “comments to a social media post get longer, the possibility of a reference to marriage approaches one”.

Indeed it got to a point when I actually thought to stop his botheration by stating my marital status as being married to him!

Kindly note that I’m straight, and have absolutely no interest in anybody’s rectum (male or female).

Fortunately for him, Facebook insisted that the other person had to accept the status, and so Mark Zuckerberg saved him.

Strangely I don’t recall him congratulating me after I got married.

I make it a point of duty not to ask my single friends/relatives about their marital status, I might tease if auto-spell changes “aeons” to “Aaron”, but that’s about it.

A few days ago, I read comments to a friend’s post, where the marriage brigade went on and on about him not being married at almost 50 years old; but quite frankly it’s absolutely nobody’s business!
In this particular gentleman’s case, he had lost one or two fiancées to the cold hands of death.

Marriage is not an achievement!

There’s no Forbes List for successful marriages.

Shawn Carter and Miss Knowles would each make their lists- individually, married or divorced, but note that their $1.3billion joint net worth, still hasn’t gotten him or her into the Billionaires’ List.

If you’re married and it’s paradise, good for you.

If it’s hell, make arrangements to get out.

If it’s okayish, then do what you can to make it better.

But by no means should you become a source of nuisance to those who are still single.

Life is already hard enough as it is, without the constant badgering about settling down, as though one were dust.

And to the singles, please keep your heads up.

If it’s by choice, then, by all means, live your life to the fullest attainment of purpose, and in the best way that you can.

If it’s otherwise, then keep working at being a better you, while you wait for that special person.

Note that successful people do not suffer a lack of admirers or suitors (motives notwithstanding).

But do make wise decisions, and by all means, do not be pressured to settle for less than you truly deserve.

All these also, do not undermine other people’s happiness/relationships.

Have a great life!

Godwin Tom-Lawyer




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