This is the concluding part from part 4……
Basically, her husband was a service provider whom I made contact with severally to supply certain things and my crime was that on her accompanying him to the delivery this particular time, she found out that my address had changed and he knew the new place I resided. I recall coming out to pick the goods and noticing her face was a bit sour that day but I concluded then that there was probably something else on her mind . I tell you it was painful but I did not know the extent of the pain until I left her presence and got on the one hour bus ride home. I climbed to the upper deck seating and cried all the way home. I got home and thank God for girlfriends, I called one of them who was understanding and provided me with a listening ear.
How did I react later on? Not too great at first. I forgave her but I became distant, very careful of married ladies or initiating a relationship with them. However one day the Holy Spirit accosted me that I had become unfriendly as a defence mechanism even to other people and I had to repent. Looking back, I should not have let the insecurity of one woman put me off potential relationships.
I thought I had dealt with it all but several years down the line, I found out that this lady who accosted me had also told some other people in the likes of “I had to warn her off my husband ….”. I am not sure which was easier to deal with, walking around in a community and thinking about the many people who were probably looking at me with prejudice or forgiving the person who started the whole rumour. The fact is we women have a strong tendency to gossip and when it comes to the gist of “the other woman”, we do not spare her at all. We are quick to take sides with the “Mrs” and believe the worst of the “other woman” warning others to be careful! Walking around with perceived accusations over your head can be really mentally tasking. It has led some people to depression.
Have you been down that path before? I can feel you and only ask that you not only forgive whoever you need to but take the necessary actions needed in the right manner(for me in this situation, I changed my service provider).
I became more sensitive from that experience and as such these days advise people strongly to sort out issues of a perceived “other woman” with their spouse as even when there is actually an affair, speaking to the “other woman” has not been known to do much good. More so, if the accusations and rumours are false, it would inflict unimaginable pain and obviously damage someone else’s reputation. The only person who profits from this kind of action is the devil who loves to slander. God forbid that in this 21st Century, we become the devil’s little helpers. Selah!
Lest I forget, a friend of mine recently went to a restaurant with her husband and some friends and while they were eating, another lady was passing her number on a piece of paper to her husband. She didn’t even know until she heard her husband say in a loud voice “I do not want your number you may want to pass it on to my wife”, See local trouble .
I love to write,
PS: “Remember having opinions is a fundamental human right. Exercise yours and leave others to exercise theirs”
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