Attitude,  Introspection

The list…

Usually most Decembers, or perhaps right from the last few weeks of November, most write ups automatically go into the “Thanksgiving mode” where everyone is encouraged to adopt the attitude. “Be grateful”. “Be Thankful,you  made it” .These phrases usually evoke several reactions ranging from an enthusiastic compliance to a too familiar approach and  unfortunately but honestly, resentment. Sometimes we may really find ourselves resenting all the end of the year talk concerning Thanksgiving. After all, there is hardly anything that may have moved off our wish list or changed in our relationships and the need to be grateful is something we have delegated only to those people whose stories almost brought out the little green eyed monster in us .

While we were growing up and in high school. my siblings and I had the privilege of attending boarding schools. So, every term, our parents asked us to make a list of the things we needed. I remember that although we made those lists, not every item was purchased. While some items were crossed out, for some other items, the quantity we specified was reduced so as to fit to the budget.

It is a wonder to me now to think that earlier on in life, our parents indirectly thought us to distinguish our wants from our needs. Well, I am not sure we learnt that lesson fully because even up till now, some of us still have our lists.

Interestingly as the year draws to an end, we bring out the list and our response is usually dependent on our mindset.

So perhaps while taking stock, maybe we should do it a little differently and have a list of complaints. What are those things you are not happy about? The things you looked up with hope would happen this year and it seems they have still not happened. Begin to write them one by one and if perhaps you need some starters or reminders, let us look at your home situation, what of your job? In the area of health for yourself or loved ones, did you lose someone this year  due to ill health or more annoying a terrorist bomb attack or perhaps  to those insane people who go shooting randomly or did your marriage break down this year in spite of all you put in?


Did your stocks diminish in size greatly and rather than being an investment have left you in great debt? Or perhaps, did you lose all your property to fire or the several hurricanes of this year and unfortunately as an illegal migrant, you cannot claim anything or let the government know of your misfortune.

Maybe this year also, you have had to withdraw your children from school due to finances and your car went off the road. I dare say your list is beginning to form now and you should take out time to write it to the tiniest details. Surely, there is no need to be thankful.


Let me indulge you to look at that your list of complaints again, several people who have what you are perhaps asking for are no longer here and while some of them are, they are not even in the right frame of mind or health to enjoy them. But you are here today, reading this article from your favourite blog. To be honest, we at “dishusbandmata” are concerned about relationships and have long discovered that   gratitude is all time seasoning for good relationships. Before you stop reading, take a little time to write down things that happened  or did not happen to you this year that you can be grateful for. You can also add attributes in your loved ones that brought a smile to your face this year. If you are looking for a place to start and would perhaps love this to be a whole month exercise, then I encourage you to visit a site by one of my friends who gives us reasons every day in December to be grateful for.

Can’t still find any reasons to be grateful, then be grateful for the entire team at “Dishusbandmata” who have tirelessly ensured that every Friday in this year, there has been something to read to help relationships. It has been quite a challenging year (I will talk about it later), but for now, I am taking stock while writing my list in an attitude of gratitude.


Remaining  Thankful.,
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