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Consent & Sexual Assault
Today delivers a heavy topic but a particularly important one. It goes without saying (but must be very clearly stated) that sexual assault is only ever caused by one person, the perpetrator. FULLSTOP!!! I believe that sex is a beautiful gift that was meant to be enjoyed by a man and woman who are united in holy matrimony and have consented to the act at that particular point in time. Obviously, sex takes place in other settings as well and it is important to acknowledge that. Like every good thing in this world, people misuse this gift in sadistic, disgusting ways. I wonder how God must feel when he sees…
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About Frenemies 2
After last week’s article on Frenemies, I got feedback from people that showed that it was something that resonated with them . As I thought about the sequalae, and what next to write, I suddenly remembered what a friend once told me about her dad. We were talking about something and the name of a government official came up. This man was among the first five men ruling the country at that time. She shocked me when she said “that man was my dad’s friend. He used to visit our house”. I was really surprised that they knew such an influential person in the corridors of power and before I…
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About Frenemies
When I was eight years old, a friend whom I met in the after school lessons gave me a card. It was titled “Why God made friends” and although I don’t remember all the words of the card. I remember this part “God made friends because he knew mothers could not be everywhere“. And although it has been over three decades, I look back and see that most of my philosophy of friendship has always had a mother’s perspective. I also learnt how to be a friend by observing how my mum related with her friends, both in their presence and absence. If my mother is your friend, you know your back is covered…
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Seeing the other side
One of the joys of WhatsApp is the ability to connect to several people in a group setting. Although this can be a source of joy and bring back real memories especially if it is to a people we once shared history with , it also has its share of pain and drama. Realistically, the further down the history with a group, the more diverse the individuals would be . Taking my high school Whatsapp group for instance, at one point in our lives , we were all joined together in a private school because we belonged to a certain social class. However, when we parted ways, life happened to…
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Weird Proposals 3
When it comes to proposals,sometimes they go south because they have been done too early And then the question comes on how early is too early ? I say it actually depends .I know someone who proposed to his wife two weeks after they met . They were on a date and he asked her to marry him .She asked him “when?”.and then he told her ,give me an answer first and then we will work the details out .Of course ,it takes someone who is tryout convinced and know what they are looking for ,especially with the ability to recognize it and almost twenty years later ,they are still…
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Weird Proposals 2
I was on “Linked In” the other day and read about a proposal a pilot made to his fiancee . It was on a certain flight (he planned it ,on the same flight they met ) and began his announcement from the cockpit . He praised his fiancee highlighting how she had been very encouraging and instrumental to his progress and his career as a pilot . He asked some passengers to pick something in front of their seats and then actually told her to look behind her .He had gotten some fellow passengers to hold placards that said, ‘”will you marry me ?” ,when she turned around ,he was…
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What Men want …4
We women generally love to talk and it’s not surprising that the men had something to say around this issue. “It’s very insensitive when wives talk bad about their in-laws in the presence of the husband. That hurts deep.” This is a word for all of us and not just women; however, women seem to have mastered the weapon known as the tongue, a bit more than the men. There are a few characters in this drama so everyone should listen up! In most cases the in-law(s) who is the subject of the matter tends to be female so only God knows what she said or did to warrant this…
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What men want …3
Let me just make a confession here. Getting all this information from the men convicted me of some of my actions. “Men are not mind readers – hence the need for clear communication.” In fact, I am guilty of this one right now. I have been moody for over twenty four hours, waiting for hubby to realise that I am not myself and ask what is going on, but the guy is just carrying on as normal and my mood is not getting any better. But come to think of it, if I go and change into something skimpy and walk around the house, still wearing my moody face, I…
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What men want …2
It seems like after the question of how we look was raised , the men shifted to how where we live looks.Bedroom matters came next… “Unfortunately, the bedroom we share starts to look more feminine over time. We men sometimes wish we had our own man cave/bedroom; but for the sake of peace…. Have you seen that scene in ‘How to lose a guy in 10 days’ where Matthew M goes into his bathroom cabinet and sees tampons and shaving stuff and everything girly he never thought he would see in his personal space? That’s the picture I got when I heard this comment. I laughed when I watched that…
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That “other” woman 4
The instinct of the danger of the other woman is one that most women can identify with as far back as their childhood days. When it comes to being mistaken for the other woman, it can come in so many forms, sometimes from strangers who actually are acting in sympathy to the woman of the house and as such have tagged you a traitor who deserves some form of punishment. A University classmate of mine recounted recently how she went to the bank one day dressed up as usual (to give you a little picture, when we were in school, this babe was always dressed to the kill, on…