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Sleeping with the enemy
Yesterday was International Men’s day and unfortunately while we were celebrating the men, one man in my home country shot his wife and killed himself. His wife was rushed to the hospital and thankfully at this point, we have not heard she has gone to the great beyond. Sometimes I wonder what would make a man kill his wife? And because sometimes it is the other way, why would someone kill their partner? A close friend once recounted the story of a Pastor who died at the hands of his wife following severe burns. She poured fuel on him and set him ablaze in the house .What was even more…
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Esteem me
People assume we have time for all sorts in this current situation of ‘lockdown’! With the number of Teams Meetings and Zoom Parties, you would think that everyone was jobless and desperate for attention; but one thing we certainly have time to do is ‘think’. From reflecting on the past to preparing for the future, there is a lot of thinking going on in these times, well at least I am doing a lot more thinking than usual. I have good days and not so good days, as the pressure of being forced to stay indoors for my own protection is getting to me a little. I am home with…
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International Day for “Ending Violence against Women”-Nov 25th
So today is another November 25th and the whole world is celebrating a day marked for the “Elimination of Violence against Women” and we here at Dishusbandmata are not left out. C.A.D.A is actually one of the means by which we seek to help to ensure healthy relationships, raising awareness of Domestic abuse in churches. In honour of this day, throughout this month, our focus has been on Domestic abuse, the various forms, being able to recognize it, ways to prevent it and the need to seek help sometimes. If there is anything I know from listening and observing people, nothing devastates a woman more than not having peace in…
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The Friendship Factor
I am a firm advocate for the notion which says ‘Marry your best friend”. It’s something I have believed even before I fully understood what marriage was all about. The word ‘friend’ in the 21st century has come to mean a lot of different things and people generally agree that there are different levels of friendship. From my perspective, it feels a little weird discussing friendship in the context of marriage. How did you get to being married if you were not friends? Well, we had a mutual respect for each other, we had a lot in common, he/she is from a good home and is stable…? These are…
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When Love is a Lie 2
Stephanie was very embarrassed when some family friends came visiting and asked after her husband. He had left the house as usual without informing her about his whereabouts. It was now his norm, although she had spoken to him about it severally. He was the owner of the house and did as he pleased. When he was around, he minded his computer and hardly ever helped with the children. He only gave orders, correcting her like a child and demanding to know how she had spent every penny. She was always having to gauge his mood before she brought up any topic The few times she tried to talk about…
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When Love is a Lie
The hall was filled with guests all gallantly dressed to the kill. Sitting down in the congregation, it was difficult to discern the distinct scents of the several perfumes that filled the air. Everyone looked happy after all that is what people were meant to be when they came for a wedding. The groom was already at the altar and the bride had just started walking in. People seemed to have taken the cue from an invisible signal and everyone stood to their feet as they watched her majestic march till she got to where her groom was but instead of stopping, she walked past him and took the side…
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Escape
It was a scorching hot afternoon on a weekday, and our neighbours children came over to play with my brother and I. We’d all been friends far longer than I could remember because our parents worked together. This hot afternoon was like many others, we played several games with each other in our compound. We raced each other, we skipped, we laughed. It was all fun and games until it was nap time. I went to one of our empty guest rooms to sleep; my brother kept playing with the neighbour’s children. I don’t know how long I had been sleeping for before I felt something creeping up my legs.…
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SPEAK UP;Someone can help
……he stood behind me innocently in the queue for library registration then I felt it; hard, pressing on my back it took a while before I realised what it was, a disgusting violation; I will never understand why I stayed silent even though I walked away…. I let him go just like that to harass another victim… When it comes to sexual harassment, every parent must think of how to have conversations with their children about inappropriate behaviour so they can identify what’s good and what’s not. I was very happy to come across some info at my children’s nursery about the meaning of pants and thank NSPCC for the work they do. So PANTS means: P…
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Love is NOT enough
If LOVE was what kept a marriage, then mine would have outshone eternity. I loved my husband and even the devil could testify to that. I had dreams for my home right from the time I was a child. Like almost every woman, I dreamt about the big day and the many happy loving years after that I had read about in those girly novels. My husband(let’s call him Eugene) and I met back in my home country and started a relationship which did not materialize, shortly after which he left the country. Not long after he relocated, I did also and we renewed contact. I had the right legal…
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Blurred lines
I wonder if you read Sunday’s post about saying No.It was the one titled”Red Light”. I could fully empathize with the writer. It made me remember when I had to stay over at a friend’s place last year. This friend was not in town and allowed me to stay over for a few days. As I got into the room, thanking God for a safe journey and unpacking my bags, I heard a neighbouring female moaning in the bliss of sex. It brought back a painful memory. I was studying really hard during my university programme and while working on my dissertation, I was chatting with a friend based…
